The Get Curious model – helping to build trust when relationships are stretched

[Lucia Labouchere]

Giving constructive feedback role-play
The GET CURIOUS(TM) model helps build trust in a team when relationships are tested.
You can one lead person (the feedback giver) and then one, or more than one, receiver of the feedback – as you will see it is not really a give and take scenario
These are the steps that guide the structure of the conversation
• GE – gathering evidence on the other person’s/ persons’ experience
• T – telling the person that you hear them, acknowledge where they are at, tell them if you genuinely can
see something positive that they have done and only enter the conversation if you can communicate with
absolute respect (e.g. ‘I hear where you are at, that sounds hard, I know that you did this well’)
• C – connecting and asking what an ideal scenario would look like from here, what do they want to happen
going forwards
• U – understanding what it will mean to them to achieve that
• R – understanding their reality and what skills they can leverage off, what are they missing, what do they need
• IO – inspiring them to think of their options
• U – understand the plan and what they commit to doing with deadlines
• S – work out who can support them to do this
Participants work in groups of three to role-play scenarios provided by facilitators. Each scenario will
involve three roles:
1. The person giving the feedback
2. The person receiving the feedback (reflecting on how they felt about the feedback after the role-play)
3. Observer (commenting on facts, body language, voice, emotions, and approach by receiver and giver
of feedback)
You can choose one of the scenarios on the following page or another challenging relationship/conflict that you are currently
experiencing/have experienced to inform your responses and drive your observations.
The role-play lasts for 10 mins, which is followed by 5 minutes feedback from
the observer (including comments both from the person giving and receiving the feedback). Once completed, swap roles and do
another scenario until each participant has done all three roles.
Remember that this process may feel awkward before it becomes elegant and gets better with practice.
Scenario 1 – Managing upwards:
Alex and Patricia are running for a promotion. Patricia is by far the better candidate but you have been called
by a senior member of staff who has recommended that you employ Alex who is his nephew’s friend. Manage
the phone conversation with the senior member of staff using the GET CURIOUS model.

Scenario 2 – Managing a peer:
You have noticed that for the last couple of months your colleague Chimwemwe who you have known since
university has been a little distant with you. You have just found out that he has had a meeting with a team
about a project you know you should be handling – you feel he should have included your department. You are
going to see Chimwemwe to talk this through. Use the GET CURIOUS model to do this.

Scenario 3 – Managing conflict in the team:
You have noticed that your usually well-functioning team has recently been disturbed by two of the members.
Robert has been spreading rumours about Colin that he never does any of his own work and is lazy in his job.
Speak to Robert using the GET CURIOUS model.

[Lucia Labouchere]

Please note I edit the scenarios for each client and often invite the client to design them so as to have relevant and useful scenarios for the context. I work in many different contexts around the globe.

[Author]

Posts